I feel like a democrat. My proposed budget is being shot full of holes as we speak. Meeting tomorrow to discuss it and what to do next. Thankfully I’m meeting with other democrats so I’m hoping tears will be kept to a minimum. Maybe I’ll take along some extra ativan just to be sure. Maybe some Tylenol 3, too.
Shingles February 25, 2009
Still having shingles issues. Yesterday wasn’t so bad, pain-wise. Today has been awful. Plus I seem to have broken out in hives on my stomach. It itched all day long.
I met with my pyschiatrist today. First time since last November. Of course, I’m supposed to see her once a month. She spent 1/2 of our twenty mintues together fussing at me. I wanted to say, “Look, I’m bipolar. I’m compliant, but hardheaded. Surely I’m not the first hard-headed bipolar you’ve treated. You HAD to know what you were getting into!” Of course, I didn’t say any of that. I just nodded my head and apologized and promised her and myself that I’d do better. And I’ll try. But we both know I won’t succeed.
She also made me promise that I’d start therapy as soon as I’m financially able. Told her it’d probably be early summer. I’m ambivalent about therapy. I know I need it but I don’t want it. Of course, I’m ambivalent about my meds, too, but I manage to take those every day. We’ll see, I guess.
Going to take another pain pill (have I ever mentioned how much I like pain pills?) and hopefully drift off into a pain-free, oblivious sleep. Until Peter comes home with my nightly ice cream. 🙂
I’ve Been Bad January 20, 2009
I know some will think its a bad bad thing, but I took my last dilaudid tonight. I’m not in any physical pain but sometimes the emotional pain is too much, as well. The “itch” has started and I feel completely relaxed and at peace. Amazing.
The BiPolar Express 